What was once a home marked by conflict, silence and misunderstanding has become a peaceful, united and productive family. For Steve Mulagha and his wife, Kettie Shaba, from Fashion Village under Group Village Headman (GVH) Katumbi in Traditional Authority Kilupula, Karonga District and the transformation has been life-changing.
Married since 2011 and blessed with four children, the couple says their family is now free from abuse and built on love, respect and a shared vision for the future. They attribute this remarkable change to the SMART Couple lessons delivered through the Gender and Child Protection Project implemented by Lusubilo Community Care with financial support from Catholic Relief Services (CRS).
Before joining the project, life at home was very different. Communication was poor, misunderstandings were common and family decisions were rarely made together. Mr. Mulagha admitted that he neglected his responsibilities as a husband and father. He would sometimes spend days away from home without informing his wife, creating tension and mistrust within the family.
“I could leave home for three days without thinking about my wife and children. I never saw anything wrong with it then, but the SMART Couple lessons opened my eyes. Today, that behaviour is completely behind me,” he said.
He also confessed that caring for the children was something he believed belonged only to his wife. Even when the children needed comfort or attention, he would leave everything to her.
“Now I understand that raising children is the responsibility of both parents. I take part in meeting their educational needs, caring for them and helping them grow into responsible people,” he explained.
His wife says the changes have restored happiness and peace in their home.
“The lessons taught us to forgive one another, communicate openly and solve problems together. We now prepare our family budget together, support each other with household chores and are open with each other in every aspect of our marriage. Our home is now filled with love and understanding,” she said.
The couple says learning about forgiveness, communication, joint planning and mutual respect has completely changed the way they relate to one another. Instead of allowing disagreements to divide them, they now sit down, discuss issues and find solutions together.
The stronger relationship has also brought economic progress. Working as a team has enabled the family to improve their farming and start a grocery business, providing them with a reliable source of income. Unlike in the past, when they often experienced food shortages, the family now has enough food throughout the year.
Their business profits have also enabled them to save MK350, 000 through their Village Savings and Internal Lending Communities (SILC) group. The couple plans to use the savings to build a larger house, as their current home is no longer adequate for their growing family.
The positive changes have not gone unnoticed.
“Many people admire the way our family has changed. Some come to learn from us because they have seen that when a husband and wife work together, the whole family benefits,” said Mr. Mulagha.
The couple now intentionally involves their children in family activities and discussions, helping them grow up in a home where cooperation, responsibility and respect are valued.
The family encourages other couples to take the SMART Couple lessons seriously, saying the knowledge they gained has not only ended abuse in their home but has also laid the foundation for a stronger, happier and more prosperous future.